Lifestyle sentence

The Season-Long DD

Severity
Category
Cost
Cheap
Time required
full season

The loser is the league's designated driver for every group outing until next season, sober, on-call, and responsible for a minivan's worth of people who will not remember their sacrifice. One Boston league brands it 'the Side Hustle' and requires renting a bigger vehicle for large groups. The most public-spirited punishment that still feels like a sentence.

The long haul: this is not a one-afternoon sentence. With a time commitment of full season, the punishment keeps paying out (for everyone else) long after the season ends. Long sentences need a written end date and a league-appointed enforcer who checks compliance.

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